Coaching & Leadership Development
November 16, 2017

Why Headteachers need to Support each other

Why Headteachers need to Support each other


Like all top leadership positions, school leadership and headship in particular brings with it the type of power that isolates: positional power. The higher up you are in an organisation, the more your positional power means that you not only have increased pressures and responsibilities, it also means an increased distancing in relationships.


Learning how to balance the need for human connection, with the need to maintain the integrity of the leadership role, is a challenge many Head Teachers  face.  It is a challenge that is best addressed when individuals invest in building both internal and external networks of support. Which include turning to their fellow Head teacher colleagues.


When you are ‘lower down’ the school hierarchy it is much easier to build relationships with those who are like you and to share problems with those who will have had similar experiences. To begin with there are more of you. If, for example, you are a class teacher in a primary school or a head of year in a secondary school, there will be others that hold the same position who you can turn to for support.


However, as you climb, the number of individuals that hold the same or similar post diminishes until, finally, you reach the top – head teacher – and look around to find that there is no one in your setting who holds the same position as you.


Overcoming loneliness at the top


In learning to cope with the isolation brought about by positional power, Head Teachers have to learn how to develop new types of relationships. An individual’s capacity to do so will impact on the degree to which they are able to deepen levels of resilience and maintain a hopeful and optimistic outlook.


This is essential, as rarely are Heads told of the personal psychological and emotional adjustments that accompany the school change process and which often lead to heightened feelings of isolation. Many Heads think, “I must be the only one going through this.” when their internal equilibrium tips.  It’s not until forums are created where it is safe to share with other Heads, that they realise they are not alone and that indeed many of their fellow Heads are feeling the same way!


Learning to Walk Again



These unfamiliar psychological and emotional adjustments often leave many a good Head feeling like they are having to learn to walk again. Just as when they were a child learning to walk and had to be supported by loved ones to move from a place of unconscious incompetence to unconscious competence [Maslow’s Four Stages of Learning], so as a school leader, they too have to be supported to move to this confident place of being.


Very often it can be fellow Heads, who have either travelled the road before or indeed, who may be learning to travel it at the same time, who can be one of the most valuable forms of support.


Without this support, the experience for a Head Teacher who is growing into their role can be both lonely and limiting. Progress can be slow and in extreme cases stunted; neither the individual nor those they lead seem to be able to reach the level of maturity necessary for sustained personal effectiveness. However, with a fellow Head or indeed a small network or consortium the journey to ‘unconscious competence’ can feel so different.


Learning to share the load


Find the right fellow colleagues and you may just find individuals with whom you can:


– Confide in

– Share a laugh and a tear

– Problem-solve

– Develop a sense of camaraderie

– Scheme and dream

– Learn to walk confidently as a Head teacher


There can be no doubt that the weight of Headship can at times feel like an incredibly heavy load. Which is why we must find ways to alleviate this burden and make it feel lighter to carry.


Whether it’s conferences, networks, action learning groups or peer to peer support; all should be seen as potential ways for helping Heads to support one another and  overcome the loneliness of leading from the top.


Creating Supportive Network of School Leaders


I believe that if school leaders are to keep their hope alive and perform consistently to the high levels expected of them, they need a variety of support. One of the most vital forms of support any Headteacher can have is the support of their fellow School Leaders.


That’s why every term in a cosy private dining area of this Central London location, we organise and facilitate a Headteacher Nurture meal designed to create a supportive, relaxed and collaborative space in which Heads can lean back and just for a couple of hours let go of the burden of school leadership, appreciate and enjoy the company of fellow school leaders.


The meal will be facilitated and will also involve discussing some key questions and issues around school leadership, exploring thought-provoking prepared materials, and sharing experiences designed to give leaders a chance to…


– Connect with fellow leaders who may be facing similar challenges.

– Share their rich experience and resource

– Regain perspective on the school leadership role

– Build new relationships and form supportive networks with like-minded colleagues

– Find collaborative solutions to issues they’re facing


Next Nurture Meal – Wednesday 17th January 2018

Venue: The Prince Regent, 71 Marylebone High St, London W1

Time: 6.00pm – 9.00pm


Sign up for the Next Nurturing Headship Meal

Places are limited and we have already started to take reservations. To register your interest, simply follow the link below:


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