Coaching & Leadership Development
July 11, 2017

How to Make Time for a Life Outside of School

How to Make Time for a Life Outside of School

 

It’s incredibly easy to lose yourself in the role of being a Head, to the point that your private life simply drops off the schedule as you work on autopilot, just getting through the day. But this is dangerous, not only for your health and your relationships, but for your school life as well.

 

The truth is as much as we may treat our work lives and personal lives are separate, when one suffers, it is rare for the other to go on completely unaffected.

 

Therefore, if leaders are to stay at their best, they need to find a balance and devote the same care to both, both for the well-being and for the sake of their own personal efficacy.

 

No matter how much you might not want to admit it sometimes, you’re a person in a role, not a robot. This means that you have all of the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual needs that people have, including that of work life balance.

 

So many Heads just assume that stepping into this role means an end to their work life balance. They put their heads down, get through day after day hoping to make it to retirement, and end up totally incapacitating themselves.

 

If you’re currently in “Robo-Head” mode, don’t wait for a crisis to force you to re-evaluate. Instead, bring some consciousness into your work life balance. Look at how things are now, what’s working and what’s not working. If you find yourself saying a lot of “Yeah, buts” — as in, “Yeah I should spend more time on myself, but…” then ask yourself, “What does it cost me, my family, my friends etc, to keep making these excuses?”

 

Creating a plan for your personal life

 

When you started in your position as Head, you set some goals and developed a plan of action steps to take you towards them. You would never dream of simply showing up at work without a plan, seeing what happens, and hoping for the best. But if you’re like most Heads, that’s exactly what you’re doing with your personal life. If that’s the case, is it any wonder that your work life balance isn’t as it should be?

 

So try creating a plan for your personal life the same way that you would for your school life, and — this is the important bit — treat both plans equally.

 

You have to follow your personal plan with just as much dedication as your work plan, or you’ll end up right back where you started.

 

In order to make this work, you’ll need to do the following 6 things…

 

1. Recognise that it’s important

 

The idea of having good work life balance as a Head can seem laughable, but it’s absolutely critical for your wellbeing, your relationships, and your career, so you should take it seriously.

 

2. Seek out the things that bring you joy

 

There’s no point in creating time for a life outside of school and then spending it bored out of your mind doing nothing. Instead, think about those things that you really enjoy doing, the things that replenish your sense of self, and actively incorporate them into your life.

 

3. Recognise that there will come a time when you won’t be a Head anymore

 

When you’re in the middle of Headship it can feel like you’ll never do anything else, but there will be a time after this job, and if you put your life on hold until then the transition will be very difficult. The more you do things outside of school while you’re still in the role, the better.

4. Think about your family

 

Ask yourself what kind of memories do you want your partner or your children to have of you, and whether the way that you’re working now will allow for those memories to be made. This will help give you the motivation to make out of school time a priority.

 

5. Make good use of your senior leadership team

 

They’re there to help you lead the school — if you could do everything yourself, you wouldn’t have them! So ask yourself, are you making the best use of them? If there are problems in the team, don’t ignore them, because this will only add to your work load. Find the right support to help address the challenges and develop your team, so that leading feels more of a shared responsibility.

 

6. Communicate with your governors

 

It’s your governors’ job to oversee your wellbeing, but they can’t do that properly if you don’t communicate your needs to them. Find some time to have a proper conversation with them about the benefits that proper support will bring to the school, and work on getting measures put in place that allow for reflection, coaching, and personal development, that you and all those who aspire to greatness need.

 

How can School Leaders lead their Schools without sacrificing their Well-being?

 

What many leaders have learnt but others are still yet to see is that investing in themselves and doing what is necessary to ensure their psychological and emotional needs are met is not selfish, but rather it’s vital for successful and sustainable leadership.

 

If our school leaders are determined to stay in the profession for the long-haul, they must begin to take charge of their well-being and develop generative and sustainable ways of leading which will support them in their complex and challenging roles.

 

That’s why we hosted our unique “Education for the Soul” conference on Thursday 18th October 2018 to help address this issue and explore how leaders can successfully manage and respond to the growing complexities and emotional demands of School Leadership.

 

It is fair to say, the day was a very special one and a huge success with so many school leaders and education professionals joining us for this. It was so wonderful to watch these individuals drop their leadership masks and come together, in service of one another and in service of shared hopes, dreams and ambitions for our children and our schools. Following the success of the conference, I’m delighted to say that in October 2019, we will once again host Headteachers & School Leaders for this special conference.

 

The conference will aim to build on the outcomes of “Education for the Soul” 2018 and seek to explore how school leaders and teachers can learn to lead with integrity, depth and purpose. As part of this, we will look into how individuals can stay connected to their “why” and the role coaching can play in helping those in education in create alignment with their deepest values.

 

Above all, “Education for the Soul” Conference 2019 will aim to help school leaders and teachers:

– Foster a deep sense of vocation and purpose amongst all staff

– Gain a better understanding of coaching (theory, processes, neuroscience etc.) and how it enables others to work in deep alignment with their true values

– Increase their understanding of the relationship between school development and adult development

– Keep hope, joy passion, commitment and creativity at the heart of their school and relationships with self and others

 

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