Coaching & Leadership Development
November 11, 2019

Imposter Syndrome – How to Silence your Inner Critic

Imposter Syndrome – How to Silence your Inner Critic

 

This blog comes from teacher and experienced leader of SEND interventions, Jo Steer (@Skills_w_Frills)


The term “imposter syndrome” was coined by clinical psychologists Pauline Clance and Suzanne Imes in 1978, to describe those who live with the fear of being found out and exposed as a fraud.

This common phenomenon is said to have affected some of the highest achievers in the world: supposedly Albert Einstein, Maya Angelou and even Meryl Streep have experienced it.

I’d wager that those feelings of self-doubt sound familiar to a large number of educators, myself included. A little anxiety and passing insecurity is natural, beneficial. Imposter syndrome is not.

It’s more than that. It’s a persistent, nagging feeling that you’re somehow lacking or undeserving of the position that you find yourself in.

It’s an inner monologue of “I can’t”, “I’m not X enough” and “Who am I to think I can do this?” It’s the discounting of positive feedback and the tendency to attribute achievements to luck, timing, resources or colleagues.

As educators, we experience a continuous expectation to self-reflect, as well as listening to others reflect on our capabilities. These could be beneficial, if they weren’t so frequently combined with an unsustainable workload and unrelenting pressure, which can all too easily become fuel for feelings of insecurity and self-loathing. If this sounds familiar, the following could help:

1) Push back against perfectionism

Imposter syndrome thrives on expectations of perfection, so a good place to begin is by recognising that this is neither helpful nor realistic.

Let’s say you’ve just been promoted, so you begin comparing yourself to others in that role, picturing them to be confident, capable, flawless. Ask yourself: are these pictures accurate or are you glorifying these individuals and their skills? Are you assuming that just because they appear confident and capable when presenting to staff, that they’re always this together, even behind closed doors?

Remember that no matter how incredible someone might appear, we all have flaws.

Aim for authenticity

 

Thanks to the wonders of hindsight, I can see that my lifelong phobia and subsequent avoidance of public speaking was propped up by the expectation that I must appear calm, confident and collected at all times. Showing nervousness, therefore, made me a shameful, incompetent fraud.

Nowadays, I reinforce the idea that I don’t need to be perfect, I just need to be me, warts and all. If re-framed, vulnerability and imperfection can become powerful tools in enabling better connections with the audience. And it doesn’t half take the pressure off.

Don’t accept damaging inner dialogue

 

When the voice in your head shouts that you should be able to do this, why not respond with “Who says so?”. If your brain screams “Who am I to do this?” instead ask “Why not me?”

Whenever you hear words like “should” or “must”, know that that is your cue to argue back with yourself (but maybe don’t do it out loud).

Talk about it

 

You might just find that no one else knows what they’re meant to be doing either; that the majority of us are just faking it until we make it.


Becoming a school leader invariably means that whatever the problem, people trust and believe that you can fix it!

 

Very often it can feel as though you are carrying the full weight of everyone’s expectations on your shoulders. No matter how diverse their expectations might be, from parents to politicians, you are expected to shoulder everything.

 

On top of this, you have a myriad of responsibilities, that require you to demonstrate additional expertise as a social worker, child psychiatrist, politician and community worker, all within the space of a day – even though you’ve never been trained in these areas.

 

In light of this, it’s understandable why many school leaders struggle with feelings of self-doubt. It also makes me believe that it’s vital that our leaders are properly supported; strategically, operationally and emotionally to ensure they can keep going.

 

Social workers have supervision to help them process their toughest cases, and corporate executives have space for “lessons learned” and continuous improvement between projects.

 

However, in spite of the fact that the business world has now embraced the benefits of such support for leadership development, few in our education system have been afforded this.

 

That’s why I’m now offering completely free Coaching calls to give leaders a chance to experience first-hand the benefits of coaching and the role it could play in supporting both their well-being and their personal performance.

 

The calls provide a confidential, safe, non–judgemental space to spend 30 minutes exploring ways to:

 

– Achieve a greater sense of clarity about your direction as a school leader

– Gain a clearer perspective on any challenges that you may be facing

– Identify positive steps for moving forward

 

Book Your Call

 If you feel like you’d benefit from a call like this or perhaps know someone who would, please follow the link above!

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